Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Me and the Eagle Are Of the Same Mind

Get ready to read about the greatest occurance ever. No, wait, that's not enough build up. OK. If cancer were cured tomorrow, this would still be the coolest thing that happened this week.

"This is the story of the overly ambitious eagle who evidently found a deer head in the landfill."

Un-freaking-believeable. Seeing that story made having to watch Fox News for 20 minutes bearable.

Your I Stole That Line From a CBS Sitcom leader.

Sunday, January 28, 2007

Most Motherfuckers Wouldn't Give A Damn

My blogroll has been partly cleansed. Kevin-M promised to return one day, so even if he hasn't posted since October, I must await his glorious return.

My newest member is a militant Aussie atheist named Beep Beep. From the intro:

I am diagonally parked in a parallel universe. Like Arthur Dent from "Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy", if you do not have a Babel Fish in your ear this blog will be completely unintelligible to you and will read something like this: "boggle, google, snoggle, slurp, slurp, dingleberry to the power of 10". Fortunately, those who have had the Babel Fish inserted in their ear, will understood this blog perfectly.

My Babel Fish is a Mark VI. Awesome. Her latest post is a history of circumcision, which, refreshingly, makes no argument for or against it. Very interesting.

Of course, I have done some digging of my own. It seems rush limbaugh (he doesn't get his name capitalized anymore) has been insulting our troops overseas. At least the female portion.

The liberals did indeed bandy about, bang on the drums for women in combat. Now anyone with, it just isn’t right. Whether they can do it or not, that’s not what a cultured civilized society does to its women, they just don’t do it.
Apparently a cultured society doesn't allow "its" women to make choices. They belong to us guys, after all. Cultured places like Saudi Arabia and Iran certainly don't let "their" women fight in wars, rush. Why don't you give a call and see if there's room for you on Radio Riyadh.

Anyway, I figured I'd check out the right-wing nutters who were so upset about John Kerry's botched joke that insulted our troops. I figured they would be calling for limbaugh's head, seeing how he just shit on the women fighting for our freedom.

Powerline took Kerry to task back then. Oddly, their latest post is still attacking John Kerry. Hmm. They'll get to rush on Monday, I bet.

Captain Ed, who, as far as I can tell, is neither a military officer nor a salseman for sweetened cereal, also went after Kerry in October. Nothing on el rushbo's insults, though. Maybe that 8 hour radio show got in the way.

Michelle Malkin (shudder) went there. Her latest post has a bunch of women; maybe it's in support of female troops. Let's see; Kate O'Bierne ... she represented military women, but, nope, never served. Mona Charen ... doesn't look like it. Kathryn Lopez (Who?). No idea. Laura Ingraham? OK, I'm desperately trying not to laugh. Anyway, no taking rush to task involved there.

I'm sure I could go on, but it's nearing 2 am, so I need to go watch some more of "The Shield" and take my brother's dog out so she doesn't poop in my house again.

Your Support All of the Troops leader.

Friday, January 26, 2007

It's Not My Time to Wonder Why

Are we sure this isn't Vox Day? No, it's Henry Makow, PhD. writing about how feminism is a gay plot. it's nothing we haven't heard before. My favorite line:

Men -- steer clear of any sexual relationship where you are not in charge.

This guy is advocating mass abstinance. Women are always in charge, unless you count rape. The sad thing is, I'm thinking this guy would. He also says Gloria Steinam was a CIA operative.

Checking out the site involved, SavetheMales, it's an anti-woman/ international conspiricy site. An odd combo, I know. They also seem to think that George Bush is a Satanist. OK, enough about these guys.

Now, since I don't know Michael Brodkorb's e-mail address or secret Republican phone number, I am breaking my own shocking story.


Robin Marty of Powerliberal and George Soros finger-puppet, admitted at a Drinking Liberally event that she often just drinks a whole bottle of wine without even realizing it. She also was overheard to say, "I'm pretty sure Al (Hussein X Franken) is my guy." The Wege was heard throughout the night to say, "I'm" ... "not feeling" ... "comfortable" ... "with her leadership." "Goatse."

Chilling news. Why isn't the liberal media covering this? Brodkorb, if you read this, I'm your inside guy.

Your Undercover leader.

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Fists a'Blazin'

I didn't watch the President's speech tonight, nor have I read any reviews of it. That said, I'm betting he mentioned cutting our reliance on foreign oil. I only say this because he's said it in all of his other SOTUAs.

I've been moved to overnights, and I realize now why I don't like it. Nothing happens after 3:30am. At all. There aren't even people out driving around to bother. Anyway, get your headlights fixed if you're going to be driving around Minneapolis.

Have a good night.

Your Bad Sleeping Schedule leader.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

I got a Swirly from the Pope

This seems like something being made up to make the Dems look bad, but I'm seeing it mentioned in too many places, and my usual sources on bullshit are silent on the matter.

Section 220 of S. 1, the lobbying reform bill before the Senate, would require grassroots causes, even bloggers, who communicate to 500 or more members of the public on policy matters, to register and report quarterly to Congress, as lobbyists are required. (Emphasis mine)

Seriously? People who speak to the public must report? Please, friends, explain the point behind this. I'm willing to accept that this isn't the blatant attack on the 1st Amendment that on the face of it it appears to be, but it will take some convincing. Get to work.

Luckily I have only had 647 visitors since August, so I'm in no danger from Congress. At least not for this blog.

Somehow, I didn't forsee that using song lyrics as my post titles would bring more visitors looking for the songs. I certainly didn't think I would list first on Google for a certain Muse lyric ("No one's gonna take me alive" from "Knights of Cydonia") that brought 25 people here this week. I'm still up there for Kristin Stinar searches too, but, alas, I have no further information on her.

I need to clean up my act. Incidently, the title for this post is c Jim Gaffigan.

I'm moving to dog-watch Monday. I also only work 6 of the next 20 days. A trick of scheduling has left me with too much free time and 2 weekends off in a row. Life is good for now.

Until Congress comes for me.

Your Time Off leader.

Post: Fuck it- I've been trying to edit the font on this post for 20 minutes. It got fucked up and will not allow itself to be fixed. You win this time, Blogger.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The Sidewinder Sleeps On His Back

R.E.M. is a 2007 inductee into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. I don't normally care much for music awards, but I still congratulate the Michaels, Peter and Bill.

Also, the best show on basic cable is coming back soon:

What a neat day for me. Not so good for Right-wing bloggers.

Your End of the World As We Know It leader.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Bang on the Drum All Day

OK. I have 4 days off. If anyone wants to do something before Friday, let me know.

If I don't find something to do. I may spend 96 hours playing Civilization IV: Warlords. That would not be good for anyone, especially me.

Your Not that Bored leader.

Update: Mitch used the same song as in my title in an even more contentless post than mine today. I'd like to think we posted them at the exact same time.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Thanks for the Memories

Machiavelli would be proud. The Right would like to poo-poo our former connections to Hussein (may he rest in flame and pineapples up his ass), but I'm more worried about which future despot we're propping up right now. (Thanks to Dad for the link)

Kites may fly in Pakistan again. Hopefully they aren't attatched to nukes.

A TV evangelist sued for lying? That's like suing a bear for shitting in the woods. Or the Pope for shitting in the woods. I can never remember which.

This is the best quote:

(The evangelist) says in a book that Mr Perry was cured of his cancer, without mentioning that he died of it 18 months ago, it adds.
He died of completely unrelated causes. It was god's will, you know.

Listen. Prayer doesn't heal anything. There are studies that show that prayer is actually worse than not praying at all. Faith is no excuse for stupidity.

Your Easing Into the New Year leader.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

No One's Gonna Take Me Alive!

Note: Since searching for "No one's gonna take me alive" on Goolgle is bringing a lot of people here, I'm assuming you're looking for the song "Knights of Cydonia" by Muse. You're welcome. Now you can check out my blog.

Glen Mason got fired. Is this why? It couldn't be that the Minnesota football Gophers barely beat North Dakota State. Or that Mason went 5-26 against top 25 teams.

At least the Vikings can look forward to ... Um, the Wild are on a ... errm ... The Swarm starts its season on the 13th. Go Swarm!

It finally snowed a significant amount. On New Year's Eve. While I was working. It was fun.

Your Have A Prosperous New Year leader.