Monday, March 31, 2008

March Comes In Like A Lion

March goes out like a lamb. In today's case, that means it's white and fluffy.

Lousy Smarch weather.

Twins win opener! My World Series tickets have already been ordered.

Interestingly, if this were 2010 the game may have been cancelled. Which is bullshit. Play in the snow. Call it home field advantage.

Your We're Gonna Win Twins! leader.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

Button Up That Shirt You're S'posed To Wear

Just a quick post to point out a band that played at the 331 last night called Zoo Animal.

Normally I'm not terribly impressed by groups that play at the 331. These guys were different. They had a good groove and the lead singer had a great voice. They had a kind of mellow grunge sound, kind of like Harvey Danger's slower stuff. They also sounded a lot like a Chicago band I heard a few years back called Wonderful Smith, but without the whimsy. I only stayed for a few songs, but I'd definitely seek them out again.

Well, that's all. I wouldn't want this to turn into a real post. That would make 4 this week.

Your Unacceptable! leader

Somebody Save Me

I've woken up in what can only be described as "moderate-to-strong pain" the last two days, which means I haven't gotten to the club to work out, which means I am feeling lazy this week. Apparently I'm not sleeping very soundly, and I have no idea why.

Pain won't stop me from getting out to DL tonight. Rumor has it that PZ Myers, the guy who introduced me to lefty blogs, may be dragging his tentacled self out to the 331 Club tonight. I can't resist the siren's call....

Have you ever planned a wedding? Here's an exchange between The Affiliate and I from today:

A: Ok, do you want to walk your mom down the aisle before my brother walks my mom down, or do you want Brian to walk your mom down the aisle before my brother walks my mom and you will just walk around the side and get on the alter without walking down the aisle?

Big decisions!

Me:I'll walk my mom down. Although, I'm pretty sure she can walk by herself, being a grown woman and all. She's a tough cookie, you know. ;) Do I get to walk to the same song as everyone else? Or does that start after I'm already at the altar, checking my watch?

My wedding party march is "Scotland the Brave" from a great bagpipe music CD I have, by the way. It also happened to be my high school fight song, which is awesome.

This won't be served at the wedding: "Texan Faces charges Over Snake Vodka." Apparently he put baby rattlers in vodka and sold it without a liquor license. The man is also the "state's largest exporter of live turtles to Asia." That is something I would like to someday be. Although I'm not sure if he exports the most turtles to Asia, or if he simply has more volume than other exporters. Also, the fact that there are multiple live turtle exporters in Texas interests me.

We'll see how pissed The Affiliate is about this post. At least I didn't correct her spelling of "altar" publicly.


Your Soon To Not Be Engaged leader.

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

So He Danced A Jig And Lit A Cig

I've been honored with a spot on the Kool-Aid Report Blogroll! I guess all of those links and my brief support of Bacon for President have finally paid off. He said I'm funny, which is either an obvious sign of mental deficiency on his part or proof that Conservatives have no sense of humor. He also claimed I am "frequently blasphemous," which is patently false; I am always blasphemous. But I am made to feel welcome nonetheless, even as one of a token two.

One staple of KAR is the fisking of letters. It's something I have often wanted to attempt. I figured I would be viewed as a pretender to the LearnedFoot throne of fisking. Also, I'm pretty lazy and often forget to fisk when I get home from work. I might give it a shot in the near future, though. I've even been working on an "EPIC FAIL" picture.

I'm starting a new blog label today; International Affairs. This will probably be the only post to use it.

Let us turn our attention to Bhutan, the Last Shangri-la. A small landlocked country in the Himalaya with a kick-ass flag, Bhutan is not well known to most folk. It's a country that measures happiness as more important than GDP (Which makes its lesser-known status surprising, especially amongst my fellow lefties). A country that inspired T.D. Mischke into song (whence I got today's post title). A country whose king forced his people into democracy. Well, technically, the former king. See, current King Jigme Khesar Namgyal Wangchuck is the son of Jigme Singye Wangchuck. Singye Wangchuck called for democratic elections before abdicating the throne last year. Khesar, who is the world's youngest head of state, agreed with dad, and the elections were just held.

The people weren't really that happy about the election. They seemed to be just fine with the way things were. They like their kings. Apparently the Wangchuck Dynasty has been more than adequate. They elected an overwhelmingly royalist parliament. Which seems to be the right choice. It's not often that a king calls for his people to take more power. It's the sign of a good leader, at least in my book. So not much will change for now. At least until China decides that Bhutan's land belongs to the People (of China).

On a side note, Bhutan is a great answer if your drinking game "Categories" ever comes around to "Countries in Asia." East Timor is another answer that will amaze your wasted friends.

So now you know the current affairs of Bhutan. Kind of.

Your Token Liberal leader.

I Wonder What Would Happen To This World

Sorry about the posting gap. I was preparing for a very dangerous day. You might know it as "Easter." Those in the know call it Zombie Jesus Day. It's like the 4th of July for zombies, when they rise from the dead and people, instead of being properly horrified, think it's some sort of miracle. The zombies then use the feelings of love and wonder to get close enough to feast upon the brains of their former loved ones. It's quite devious on their part.

That link is from a new blog I've found through Brian at Primordial Blog. Despite being a KC Chiefs Fan, this PhillyChief fellow seems to be on his game. For example, from his site:

Top notch advice. And when choosing your weapon, remember to factor in rising gas prices before going with your trusty chainsaw.

It took me a little longer than normal to put down the zombies this year, mostly because of trying to fit wedding planning in between battles. Also, I took time to hit Drinking Liberally and met a young man running for Congress in the 3rd District named Ashwin Madia at the 331 Club.

I was impressed by his candor and ability to not spout slogans. Hell, he impressed Bruce with his answers. He is far more moderate that most of the DL group, whom I am sure were upset he said we can't immediately leave Iraq. He is, however, perfect for the district that is represented by Jim Ramstad. Of course, I can't vote for him, but certain future in-laws of mine can, and I know at least one of them reads this from time to time. If you're in the district, you should check him out. Don't let the (D) scare you away from a good candidate.

Finally, I question the story from these guys. They claim they were hunting gophers with fire, sparking a 160 acre grass fire. My guess is the Canadian government is trying to cover up a bigger problem.

Your Worthless Nonsense? leader.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Just 5 Feet Tall And Sick Of Me

Woman sits on toilet for 2 years. This story is for Jeremy. As a humerous side note, the Sheriff in this case's name is Whipple.

In Minnesota, the winters are long and cold, and unlike some other cold places, there's not a lot to do. That's how this kid got the practice to become the best Guitar Hero player in the world.

Congratulations to Jenna Bush. I understand why she chose to get married in Texas. The Affiliate and I also decided we'd rather stay close to home rather than have an extravagant White House wedding.

Woman smuggles skeleton onto an airplane. She was fulfilling her brother's wish to be buried in Italy. Me, I'd like to be stuffed and put on the couch to keep away potential suitors from my widow and possibly my daughter, if I have one.

Especially if she is dating a guy like this.

Jumping off your roof into the pool is kind of cool. But, see, there's no pool there. So it's not cool at all. It's just stupid. Really, really stupid.

Not as stupid as not watching Midnight Spank on G4, however.

Don't let it open the bag.

Your Evil Butterfly leader.

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Gary Gygax 1938 – 2008

His constitution was reduced to zero by disease. At least he left us before 4th Edition came out.

D&D introduced me to a lot of friends. It has been an important part of my life, even at times like now when I haven't been playing for a long time. My "poker games" have given me some of the best entertainment I've experienced, at it's all because of Gary Gygax. His name is like a shibboleth in certain circles, creating an understanding between people. I'm happy the game will live on, even though the Great Dungeon Master is gone from it.

Here's a better tribute than I could write.

A related picture: Baby DL has the nerdiest clothing.

This makes me want to have a baby just so I can put that shirt on it.

I'm working overnight tonight, so I need to get me some Brawndo.

It has electrolytes. They're what plants crave.

Your +5 Vorpal Sword leader