Kanye, even the president thinks you're a jackass. That's why these are funny.
Eddie Izzard for MP! (I'm guessing he'd join a long line of cross-dressing English politicians.)
And now I'm off to the City of Lights, Las Vegas.
(I'm being told that the City of Lights is Paris. I've been to Paris and Las Vegas. Las Vegas has way more lights. It also has Paris.) Can I be DK at a Pai Gow table by 6 o'clock? All signs point to "yes."
Your Double Down leader.