There's a new show on NBC called "Kath and Kim." It's supposed to be a comedy. I was a little worried about that when I saw that Molly Shannon was in it. Then I saw the ads, which made me ask, aren't commercials for comedies supposed to make the show seem funny? I caught the first 5 minutes of the first episode (it was recorded on my DVR after "My Name is Earl). Not a single laugh. Not a chuckle. Not a smile. Nothing. NBC is calling it their newest hit, which I suppose is accurate if you define "hit" as any TV show you air. This bothers me because NBC thought better of getting "Scrubs" for the last season and replaced it with utterly unfunny crap. Way to go, NBC executives.
And now for news!
Man names daughter Sarah McCain Palin Ciptak. Against his wife's wishes, apparently. He says he did it to "get the word out." Get the word out that there is a presidential ticket on which someone named McCain and someone named Palin are running? I think that's out there. That you support said ticket? You say you have a lawn sign. That's usually enough. The name has a shelf life of 3 weeks. Ava Grace is a somewhat pretty name (certainly better than other names growing in popularity, like Aschleigheey). My guess is you won't be having any more kids, at least with this wife. If you do, name the next one Jamie American Red Cross, to get the word out about blood donation. You know, something helpful.
Baby Girl Ciptak could always do this, I guess. I hope Ms. Cutoutdissection(dot)com realizes that many websites stop being active and are often bought out by porn dealers. Actually, I hope she doesn't. That would be hilarious.
105 Year Old Credits Long Life to No Sex. We're happy for ya. I'd rather live to 40, thank you kindly.
And, on a soberingly horrible note, there will be another zombie pub-crawl this year. It's Saturday night, in fact, and somehow the walking dead managed to get me off duty that night. There's nothing I can do to protect you. Good luck, Minneapolis. I'll try and clean up the carnage on Sunday. Just hold on for one night. Here are some tips to help you through the horror.
Best of luck.
Your Properly Horrified leader.